Ella Lauser is a new paradigm sexual health and wellness coach, writer, speaker and energetic healer. But perhaps most importantly she is the sister you probably never had!

At an early age, Ella had the unique opportunity to be a confidant and support system for many people. With wisdom, humor, and openness passed down to her from her bisexual grandma, Ella received a rich education. In 2000 at UC Santa Cruz she began The I Want Sex Club (I.W.S.C.) for students who wanted to talk about sex in a non-judgmental, supportive forum. Shortly thereafter, she graduated with a Sociology B.A. from UCLA, and then went on to teach comprehensive sexual health education to high school classrooms throughout Los Angeles Unified School District.

Now, Ella is finally working on a book that will share her insights on sexuality and in the interim she's offering exclusive private one-on-one coaching packages, providing the perfect space for women to become empowered emotionally and sexually, discovering what they want, how to ask for it and most importantly how to receive it. It's her greatest passion to be of service and offer you the tools, understanding and support to check in and be with what you really are, - amazing and beautiful!

Scratch Ella's Back So She Can Scratch Yours

This site runs on your donations, please support Miss Ella by making a little click and sending a dollar or twenty her way so she can keep researching and responding to all of your questions. Thank you!

Monday, March 29, 2010

Dip and Dab... the SENSE-sational secret tip that will heat up your night

Image originally published on http://www.cultbeauty.co.uk, thank you!

Like a moth to the flame, burned by the fire, my love is blind, can't you see my desire... that's the way, that's the way, that's the way love goes- or is it just sexy time?

"Pheromones are chemicals emitted by living organisms to send messages to individuals of the same species. The class most widely explored are the sex pheromones produced by female moths which are used to attract conspecific males for mating."- http://www.nysaes.cornell.edu/pheronet/pherom.html

This week has sent my senses soaring to new heights especially after sharing a much appreciated secret tip to the ladies last weekend at the Reveal Your RAYdiance Experience.
My dip and dab tell all parfum du jour (hold onto your panties I'll tell you in a hot second), got me invited to a "Girl's Night In" at Strange Invisable, a high-end botanical perfumerie boutique www.siperfumes.com. If you're looking for the right scent to be mixed up on you, do take a stroll down Abbot Kinney and find yourself (and your nose) in luxury at this haute spot!

Each scent is created by the owner, Alexandra, and they are organic perfection - if you think wine tasting is fun, wait until you get a bouquet of these batches! I love the "Aquarian Rose."

All right, all right- so what's the story about dipping and dabbing?
Well, first things first, answer this question ladies...

Would you like to feel sexier, more confident and authentically you?
Well, you can do sexy all by yourself each night before you head out to paint the town pink.

Let me tell you a little story, lovely lady...

When I was first out on the dating scene I was always on the hunt for a delicious perfume, I wore the top picks of the day- CK's Eternity, Clinique's Happy, etc.
And I swear, everyone at my college that I dated had previously dated a girl with the same scent. Drove me crazy to lean in for the kill and get "oh, wow you smell like (girl's name here)". Ew! Needless to say, deal-breaker.
Not to mention I just didn't feel unique and sexy. I found myself comparing myself to other women not just visually and mentally but now scent-ily.

Years later, upon reading some good ol' Tom Robbins, I came across a page in Even Cowgirls Get The Blues that suggested an entirely new approach- what I've come to call the "Dip and Dab."

If we each have a unique come hither scent biologically created to lure in good matches, well why not really wear it?
Instead of spraying some alcohol infused gardenias, I say reach down into the lips of the oh-so-awesome vulva, say hello, and return your fingertips to your temples, wrists and neck. Mix it up with a little touch of an essential oil (your favorite, mine is jasminey rose) and voila!

It's unique and certainly will cause a stir. Every woman I've shared this with has had a great night out.

AND if you're wanting to take the edge off and really own what you are (fabulous). May I venture to suggest a little self-love time too? It's a wonderful way to set the tone for the evening, because you're already satisfied and complete. When you give to yourself, it's a good sign to the universe to send more gifts your way. A thousand compliments coming at you... I know some of my girls got more phone numbers in one night using this tip than they did in a year. Yay masturbation! Talk about taking the love from the inside out!

The sexiest thing in the world is confidence, hands down (ooh pun! sweet!).

Well, this is me, being real, raw and sharing a top-notch secret. Grandie would be proud.

Question of the Week, coming soon! Please send more my way, you are all awesome! Do it, Go Ask Ella - email me at goaskella@gmail.com


  1. Wow! You are so right on about self-love! ;) It's lifes little amazing gifts to oursleves! ~Amber

  2. Just be sure not to dip your asshole or you might not have such a great night. (Sorry, I had to. You're awesome, Ella love!) ~Monique

  3. Thanks Amber! Self-love, especially when it's just you and spirit of the moment, is priceless! Forget the porn and the memory flashbacks to what was and get present to pleasure right now. Can I get an amen!

    Mo, I love you! I would hope that if someone couldn't tell their ass from their vulva that they would give me a holler LOL! However, in addition to your warning, I also would like to add that a dip during periods should be avoiding. Seeing red and smelling it- not so hot (but hey there are some men in the world that love it, go them!)

  4. yessssss!!!!! you are piping hot mama, and I am diggin your wisdom. As i am just about to get ready for my hot date tonight, I must excuse myself for some self lovin, dippin, and dabbin!
    rock on gurrrrrl.

  5. luv it sweetie... never thought natures scent would be that powerful and then I guess you really find the one who loves your scent.. xoxoxo